A
How much money have I got, is that what you're trying to ask?
(Laughter)
Q
Well...
A
Well let's put it this way: I am wealthy enough to - late last year I had synthetic dragon heads surgically fixed over the heads of the heads of all of my children.
Q
Wow!
A
Yeah. They were beggin and beggin and - and they're really fantastic, these heads. Like masks, but on there for good!, and the skin - you should feel the skin - the scales feel real!
Q
Wow.
A
Yeah. And. You know the expense, the expense is great but. But you know, it would have killed me, KILLED me not to be able to give those kids their way. They were asking me but -
Q
How many -
A
But my wife of course she heh?
Q
How many kids have you got?
A
Me? I got five. Five beautiful...and the littlest one, Minton? He was sitting next to me at breakfast this morning, and it's so cute cause he's got this, like this speech impediment thing, you know like kids have, it'll go away, not like he's gonna talk this way forever, but for now, for now it's so goddamn cute I could cry every time he - and so we're at breakfast, and I see his little face shining out from between the jaws of that surgically attached synthetic dragon head, in the shadow of the teeth his little round eyes shining in there, and he says to me, he says, "Daddy? Can you pass me the bwuttah?"
(pause)
Can you believe that? The - the - the unprecedented adorability of him and - and you know the dragon heads, when they talk, the kids? a little puff a smoke comes out too. With their words. "Daddy, can you pass the bwuttah?" and smoke in the nostrils. Cause that's how he talks. So yeah. Yeah. No. Not for nothing am I a wealthy man. |
